The adage, "let nature take its course", is sometimes so easily and superficially applied in different contexts that I grew skeptical towards it.
Why should we allow nature steer us in one path when what we desire may not actually come to past by the road we take?
Wrong.

There are relevant case studies and research that has proven our innate nature to seek control. But I shall not cite them; as a reader you can't really deny it.
The more power we yield, the more control we yearn.

As more of these things go beyond my circumference of control, I reflect and find myself wallowing in sorrow.
Should I desire, I conceive & execute plans, after plans, after plans... and end up achieving the goal, if not considerably close to it; satisfaction indeed.

But my theory couldn't be applied just everywhere.
Some theories just don't stand all the time.
This is unlike subatomic particles; we don't see them, yet they are there.
The more I sought to control, the more I lost control of myself.

In retrospect, I find myself feeling ashamed.
I shouldn't be doing this and let nature take its course instead.
Do I question my part-alien-semblance and doubt the alternative hypothesis; that it could be due to the effect of hormones and neurotransmitters, bathing my amygdala and hypothalamus that resulted in impetuosity?



I have been flying high, in a highly ambitious bid to reach cloud nine.
And it's about time to come back down; that attempts to control should cease to exist.

I didn't impose a personal limit by how much can I waver between the 2 paths.
That resulted in my splurging on impracticality, struggling to be clear on my resolve.
Thankfully I've found the lid that fits the bottle.

Now on a side note, my laptop has arrived (criticised, promoted, praised, named -- all it has gone through after I burnt a hole in my pocket).
Thereby proceeding with my plans.
Quite a number of passwords have been changed and wallpapers substituted.

The laptop is quite an essential tool in my utopia construction.
As I shape something that seems like my 'own world' to live in and shut people out, I inevitably find myself being shut in.

But yes, before I truly come to sense and deduce conclusions about my proposed plan, my mind has to be subjected to activities that aids me to retrieve back my clearer state.

Admittedly, some things are just in a mess and I find myself with an inability to deal with them all.
So.... I guess there is a plan.
Shall proceed on with the upcoming retreat -- no social networks, mobile phones; no friends per se.
Till then.

I'm a man of my words; I honour them.
2011 will be a better year for the two of us; and all those around us.
And this is the only path that is laid in front of me
I gladly take it.
Thank you, Lord.